Well, sort of.
I made one last post in my blog way back in June and then nothing.
It’s not that I had nothing to say, or share, or record. It was just, you know …. stuff. A culmination of things. Some I’ll talk about later, some I may never tell. Part of the problem was the inability to know what, or how to write some of what was in my heart. Then I just couldn’t write it out for fear of . . . Well, just fear. Then the desire to write . . . just . . . left.
Life got busy. Time got small. Then there just seemed to be no time.
No, to be brutally truthful, I didn’t want to make time for writing, or blogging in particular. I was afraid of what my fingers would spew forth. I’m not very good at controlling my fingers. Sometimes they say and do things I wish I could have left unsaid, or undone . . . or . . . just kept secret.
It is what it is though … When fingers need to write you have to let them. When fingers don’t want to write, sometimes you must force them anyway. Other times, when you shouldn’t, you just sit on your fingers and hope the words will quiet. The thoughts will go away. The message won’t need to be released. You can “keep it secret, keep it safe”, as Gandalf the Grey once said to Frodo back in The Shire, before the secret came out, and all the trouble began.
Fortunately … at the time, when the time to write was finally back, the drive to blog, write, scribble, knit, sew . . . or anything . . . was just gone. Secretly I was glad. The burden was lifted and I revelled in the rebellion of it all.
About the only drives I had left were to seek out Jesus, spend time with my children, visit my dear ones, sit on the beach, and read about the made up life and times of Sherlock Holmes.
Honestly, I’m not really sure if the drive to write is back, so much as I just know I need to write again. It’s time to stop sitting on my fingers. This whether I want to or not.
So here I am …. writing.
I suspect in the beginning it’s not going to be all that exciting really. Most likely it will be down right boring. Maybe I’ll just create a few diary like entries. Mostly to chronicle the major events of the last four months. Like I said though, who knows what my fingers will really do.
For tonight in true procrastination style . . . I’ll start tomorrow . . . I hope. At least that is the plan today.
